Story of My Life
This is the story of my life. I have written this story in 5 parts, and they are..
I am 39 years old today, and will turn 40 on July 27, 2010 if the Lord allows. I am thankful. Amen. This is the story of my life, and I will tell the truth, nothing but the truth, so help me father God. I won't reveal everything about myself here, some things are better left untold. Amen. The Lord will work for me in this matter. ¤Glory
- My Faith: Being one with Christ (not according to Christian theology today )
- Between Dreams: The dreams I had (from my childhood to adulthood )
- Determinations: The steps of faith I took (to Christian growth )
- Tears: Hard Times
- Story of My Life: Summing it all up
I am 39 years old today, and will turn 40 on July 27, 2010 if the Lord allows. I am thankful. Amen. This is the story of my life, and I will tell the truth, nothing but the truth, so help me father God. I won't reveal everything about myself here, some things are better left untold. Amen. The Lord will work for me in this matter. ¤Glory
Learning
The more I search deep within my soul, examine my thoughts, and groan within my spirit, it seems that my focus relies heavily on the teachings from my youth. I remember the thoughts I had as a child, thoughts about God, thoughts about my life and what I enjoyed, and thoughts about words my mother had spoken to me which helped me to discern right from wrong. In spite of the chastisement I got from my elders and my mother, growing up was not easy. When I look back to my experiences as a child, I wish that my learning was more geared towards intensive training rather than punishment. I was not taught the value of a dollar, except to save and put money in a piggy bank. I was not taught skillfully how to apply biblical scripture, but I was forced to go to church. I was taught arithmetic and spelling, but I was not taught how to apply them fluently. I was allowed to feed the family pet bird, but I was not taught how to provide proper care and treatment for pets. I told my teacher that I wanted to be a doctor when I got old enough to learn how to become one, but my teacher didn't give me any illustrations of what a doctor does. I was told to respect my elders, but nobody ever told me that I could learn a lot from them. I was allowed to join the church choir, but mom never explained to me what praise was all about.
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Experimenting
Growing up wasn't easy. I had a strange desire for older women from a very young age. I remember when I could have been no more than 3 years old, maybe 2, but I can't remember, I was sitting on the sofa in grandma's house while she was gone away somewhere, perhaps to the store. My mother was probably at work. However, my aunt and a couple of her sisters were in the house babysitting me. While they were in the kitchen, I pulled my pants down and sat idly on the sofa. when they came in and had seen what I had done, they told me to pull my pants up, and I did. After my 5th birthday, I had started fantasizing about older women. The fantasies were so strong that I could actually feel lust inside of me. I got erections at the age of 5, and perhaps, when I was even 4 years old. When I turned 6, I began to experiment with neighborhood girls, and female classmates at my school, which was around the same time I had already begun taking piano lessons.
Maturity
But as I got older, I became more interested in church and reading the bible. I got hooked. I asked the neighbor next door, Mr. Brown, if I could go to church with him, and he invited me to go with him to church. I remember one of my grade school teachers giving me a reading test one day when school was out, and there were no scheduled classes. She told my mother that I had a reading level that was above average. I could look at a t.v. screen during a commercial and pronounce every word correctly. Sometimes, when mom took me to piano class, another student would be in the room at the last minute or so of his lesson, and I would listen to the piano solo he was playing until his time was up. As soon as the other student got up from the piano bench, I sat right down before he left, and played his melody by ear while he listened, and it sounded very close to what he had played before. I was actually playing by ear, only until mom explained to my instructor that she wanted me to learn how to read music and not play by ear, but shortly after that, I had stopped learning to play music by ear ever since. Now, even up unto this day, I still cannot play by ear. I believe that if a child has a gift, then nourish that gift, or he/she will lose it, and someone else will get it. This is the end of the first episode. Be sure to click here to see "MY FAITH: BETWEEN DREAMS, DETERMINATIONS, TEARS ... STORY OF MY LIFE," part 2 'psychological issues.'
Growing up wasn't easy. I had a strange desire for older women from a very young age. I remember when I could have been no more than 3 years old, maybe 2, but I can't remember, I was sitting on the sofa in grandma's house while she was gone away somewhere, perhaps to the store. My mother was probably at work. However, my aunt and a couple of her sisters were in the house babysitting me. While they were in the kitchen, I pulled my pants down and sat idly on the sofa. when they came in and had seen what I had done, they told me to pull my pants up, and I did. After my 5th birthday, I had started fantasizing about older women. The fantasies were so strong that I could actually feel lust inside of me. I got erections at the age of 5, and perhaps, when I was even 4 years old. When I turned 6, I began to experiment with neighborhood girls, and female classmates at my school, which was around the same time I had already begun taking piano lessons.
Maturity
But as I got older, I became more interested in church and reading the bible. I got hooked. I asked the neighbor next door, Mr. Brown, if I could go to church with him, and he invited me to go with him to church. I remember one of my grade school teachers giving me a reading test one day when school was out, and there were no scheduled classes. She told my mother that I had a reading level that was above average. I could look at a t.v. screen during a commercial and pronounce every word correctly. Sometimes, when mom took me to piano class, another student would be in the room at the last minute or so of his lesson, and I would listen to the piano solo he was playing until his time was up. As soon as the other student got up from the piano bench, I sat right down before he left, and played his melody by ear while he listened, and it sounded very close to what he had played before. I was actually playing by ear, only until mom explained to my instructor that she wanted me to learn how to read music and not play by ear, but shortly after that, I had stopped learning to play music by ear ever since. Now, even up unto this day, I still cannot play by ear. I believe that if a child has a gift, then nourish that gift, or he/she will lose it, and someone else will get it. This is the end of the first episode. Be sure to click here to see "MY FAITH: BETWEEN DREAMS, DETERMINATIONS, TEARS ... STORY OF MY LIFE," part 2 'psychological issues.'
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